 ALVINA. soon to be FIFTEEN currently in 3G and its on th fourth level of ANGLICAN HIGH SCHOOL. proud to be in th ahsCHOIR and i'm sure many would agree with me. (: music has a strong hold on my life, as i have discovered, in many different forms. my life has many contradictions, but well, life itself is a contradiction. perfection's a goal for many, but not me. dreams are reality tht's yet to come true, & this is all that i have to say!. :D |
My Past! whee: ada ♥ anqi ♥ brenda ♥ chengjoo ♥ cheryl ♥ choirforum ♥ christina ♥ cornelius ♥ edbert ♥ eugenia ♥♥♥♥♥ huihan ♥ isabel ♥ jemimah ♥ jeremy ♥ jeremy ♥ jiahui ♥ jianle ♥ jiayun ♥ jinghiang ♥ jinmin ♥ jinni ♥ jocelyn ♥ jolin ♥ jonathan ♥ leongying ♥ lihui ♥ liling ♥ lynette ♥ marilyn ♥ marc ♥ pamela ♥ pearlyn ♥ peiyun ♥ rachel ♥ renice ♥ sheena ♥ shipei ♥ shuqing ♥ shurui ♥ tabitha ♥ tingwei ♥ vanessa ♥ vinson ♥ xinlong ♥ yingjun ♥ 3G! ♥ Credits: un deux trois quatre lyricaltragedy |
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Monday, April 30, 20076:44 PM
heh. sighs.. haiz. we were chattin a lil like we used to a moment ago. yep. but i'm totally cast out from ur life now bah.. . . here. feeling so lost. i dun know WHICH DIRECTION to turn to now.from wad u said. i could sense tt u didn't want me anymore): i feel hurt. i still love u. fuck it. i dun even know why i said tt. fuck.fuck.fuck.wadever=x . .i guess it doesn't matter anymore. how much u mean to me..i'm still waitin. but i guess tt its pointless.. haiz. fine): . i could go on and on.. 4:40 PM    [[edited cos i decided to leave out all de F words(: n sorraye abt th lines] OHWELL. i jus hope that's de last of it. oh fucksh!t. wth hav i gotten myself into?? crap. . . ohh wow. i've changed loads from last yr [beginnin] rites? ever since ********. long long story yo. every1 seems to dislike/hate me luh.=.- haiz. nvm bah=x jus told lotsa things to anqi yep. n she told me some things too. i've seriously changed loads since *[ jus crappin arnd normally yup.. heh. . . 2dae was crap. mostly it was cos i felt like sh!t, although i slept quite alot.. fr like comin 11 to de morn.. haiz. i duno wads happenin to me also luh. sian): did a crap crap dare. [it was so DAMN SPASTIC can?? shall not elaborate(:] yep. den aft sch went home with yj avril lynette christina n anqi. told yj a piece of info [lols] n den went for lunch with anqi(: heh. eat until very full. nw still feelin full=x yupp.. hahas. . . i'm like YEAH RIGHT. i still dun think so. . . call me a TOOTHEAD retard (: but WADEVA. i dun freakin care much anw. . it defeats analysis n definition. perhaps that's why its so beautiful . You never know how much you miss a person, until they are gone Cause life is like a big fight I'm stickin-and-movin, tryin to get my sh!t right He's the reason for the teardrops in my life The only one who's got enough of me to break my heart He's the time taken up, but there's never enough And he's all that I need to fall into.. . . crapsh!t. i promised tt it will be the last of it. but considerin tt i saw him kp again, i guess it wouldn't be yo. but well.. fine. i'll stop. . . i jus wna sae goodbye. n leave ur world. but i cant bring myself to do so. i tell ppl. that its not worth it 2 cry over guys. but i do so myself. i regret it. but also think its worth it. fuck. i'm contradictin myself. but i seriously cant help it. wadever. u dun give a damn abt me nw rite? ... . . allalone.it'lljustbeme(: Saturday, April 28, 20073:30 PM MY LIFE'S SCREWED LUH. well. maybe its not. BUT I KEEP THINKIN ABT IT. so U made it fuckin SCREWED. . . sae i unreasonable for blaming u luh. WADEVER. i dun fuckin care abt u anymore. no matter wad my heart says. u said that we could last real long right? but it didn't come true. i'm just so dissapointed. in u. in myself.all alone. itwasjusbecauseiaskedthequestion,isitujusgavemethatlook.andnevermetmyeyesagain. ifeelsounwantednow.iknowimnotsupposedtofeelso.fuckit.fuckthefeelings.fucktheemotions. itsscrewingmylife.plus.makingmeloseconcentrationineverydaylife. makingmefeelsadthoughihadahappyday.fuckit.fuckit. icantstop.fuckmylife.itsucks.idunexpectperfectioninmylife.buththisisshyt! . . fine. i shall stop all that. for now. but i'm just too fucked up alr. its giving me too many emotions. it shouldn't hav started in the 1st place. but i dun regret it. i hope(: i'll jus put on a smile n move forward. loveya my bestie<33 n all my dearies((: 2:58 PM  see this pic?? hahas((x guess who? it'll will be showed at family dae camp can (:  heart shaped jelly bean!! nice rite?? heh. lols. i'm being lame luh(: . . anw, i cant blog 2dae n tmr luh. cos i'll be stayin at my cuz's hse. lols. den i cant study also=x yep. n now rite. i duno why luh. but i'm still thinkin abt it. wth. i jus cant stop my mind. fuck ): . . i * u. i haven decided wad tt word should be. yeah. it depends bah. see how bah. i freakin dislike de way u treat me. n also. u lied to me rite. tt is like de worst thing can. put urself in my shoes. dun sae tt u feel worse. i feel worse than u alrite. yep. use ur brain to think pls. u did de worser thing. n nw u jus feel tt nth has ever happened. from wad i see. wtf? its like. u dun care now AT ALL. do u? i doubt so. 4get it. 4get everyth. though i guess it will never be de same again. if i could list out everyth u did. every1 will know wad u fucking did. n why i'm fucking pissed. fine. like HT said. there's no pt cryin/[or as i feel]even thinkin. abt u anymorw. but i jus cant help it luh. even if u know. i DOUBT U WOULD even FREAKIN care. Friday, April 27, 20079:26 PM  okaye. so this are the 2 rings i bought ytd luh alrites((: de black one cnnt see properly. lols): . . 2dae was fun luh okaye ;D but sth jus HAD to happen. fine lo. . . . Katharine McPhee Over It Lyrics . . I’m over your lies And I’m over your games I’m over you asking me When you know I’m not okay You call me at night And I pick up the phone And though you be tellin’ me I know you’re not alone Oh and that’s why your eyes I’m over it Your smile I’m over it Realized I’m over it, I’m over it I’m over (Chorus) Wanting you to be wanting me No that ain’t no way to be How I feel, read my lips Because I’m so over( I'm so) Movin’ on, it’s my time You never were a friend of mine Hurt at first, a little bit But now I’m so over I’m so over it I’m over your hands And I’m over your mouth Trying to drag me down and fill me with self doubt Oh and that’s why your world I’m over it So sure I’m over it I’m not your girl I’m over it, I’m over it I’m over (Chorus) Wanting you to be wanting me No that ain’t no way to be How I feel, read my lips Because I’m so over(I’m so) Movin' on, it’s my time You never were a friend of mine Hurt at first, a little bit But now I’m so over So over it I’m so over it (Bridge) (Oh) Don’t call, Don’t come by Ain’t no use don’t ask me why You’ll never change There'll be no more crying in the rain No, oh oh I’m over it (Chorus) Wanting you to be wanting me No that ain’t no way to be How I feel, Read my lips Because I’m so over(I’m so) Movin’ on, it’s my time You never were a friend of mine Hurt at first, a little bit But now I’m so over So over it I’m so over it I’m over it (Wanting you to be wanting me) (No that ain’t no way to be) How I feel, read my lips Because I’m so over(I’m so) Movin’ on, it’s my time you never were a friend of mine Hurt at first, a little bit But now I’m so over So over it So over it . . yeah. i'm over it yo. by the time u finish cooling down i'll be so over it alr. so yep. think abt it then. i think wad i type here will somehow be told to u bah(: so yeah. i dun realli care how u think anymore. since i asked u tt question jus nw. n u sae u nid time 2 cool off. when i looked in ur direction. u jus gave me that I'M-TAOING-U face. mayb u didn't mean it. but i still mind anw. sae tt i'm unreasonable. wadeva. i dun give a sh!t anymore. there's just not much pt. anymore. yep. i'll jus carry on. get over it. alone. i jus wanted an ans soon. but u made me wait. it jus hurts thinkin abt it alrites. u may not know. fine. i shall continue EMO-SH!TTIN nxt time. Thursday, April 26, 20075:20 PM my bestie muz CHEER UP okayes?? loveya loads. hahas(: so random. yupp. dun think abt it too much. i still dunno wad's going on in ur world, but i guess i hav the gist of it. dun think too much abt things bah. its not gna help u. since it's affectin u so badly. i dun want to see u like that. i feel very sad. i trust u loads okaye. i wun hear abt wad ppl sae. i dun believe them anws.. yupp. trust me too. in everyth tt i'm sayin. i hope u would.. cos i'll still believe u (x no matter what. i know ur life's worse than mine. so i'll try to make it better. if u let me.. frens always. wad are frens for?? frens dun backstab u. they believe u. they dun think wrong things abt u. they make ur life bettr. by tryin to cheer u up(: n tt's wad i'm gna do. i wna tell u. tt i'll still be here for u luh. no matter what((: . . SO.. U MUZ SMILE OKAYES?? SMILIN MAKES UR WORLD SEEM SO MUCH NICER [does it?] hahas. anw yupp. cheer up. tt's de most impt thing(: 4:58 PM hey(: tagboard's alright alr. but nw photobucket's under some STUPID maintainence. wth?? lols. i can't post pics. FOR NOW. fine. . . paper 1 was okaye. wth. i worried for nth. hahas((: i sound so bhb. . . yupp. anw went out wif anqi lynette n christina. bought rings!! i bought 2 identical ones. one is for HUITING DEARIE!!<333. . the other one for myself, hahas(: ANQI DEAR bought me this cool BLACK RING wif roman numerals on it. [so cool luh] n i gave her a butterfly sorta ring(:. . nth much more to sae. except tt i was emo-shittin a lil on a piece of foolscap durin exam. hahas(: crappin de lo tt one.. i tore de paper so tt no1 saw wad i wrote (x .haiz. i hope. but i think it wun happen. . boring boring dae luh actualli. tmr's gna be another one bah.. unless.. NAH. i doubt it will ever happen D: i've waited long :/ so it bettr be good. but.. haiz. i jus hope for de best nw luh. . ohhya, did i mention?? i changed my hairstyle yo. 2 times in A WEEK. hahas(: nw i hav this short short fringe n though she hasn't seen me yet. CHERYL is currently startin 2 suan me abt it alr. lols. tt ASSHOLE(: sighs. i hope i wun be disappointed. or i would hav 2 get over it. myself. all alone. Wednesday, April 25, 20075:02 PM ohh crap. sth's wrong with my com. or my blog. i duno luh. i cant SEE MY TAGBOARD. crapshit. nw i cant reply tags though i hav time cos i CAME HOME DAMN EARLY 2dae(: [mayb i dun even hav tags to repli??] sighs. . anw, tmr got exam le hor so every1 JIAYOUS okay?? i know i'm gna FLUNK tmr but it doesn't realli matter bah.. . emo-shittin a lil 2dae bah, cos of u, hahas((: lols haven give me ans yet. u know hw tough isit to jus sit thru exams with other questions STUCK TO UR BRAIN?? haiz nvm bah. i'll try to get OVER IT. yupp. like i promised HUITING DEARIE<33 why couldn't u hav jus gave me a simple ans, YES or NO?? haiz. this is causin me to crap here again alrites?? i jus hafta let it all out here, tt's y. u can't realli stop me. n btw, i was bloggin tt dae b4 we started talkin, so dun blame me for bloggin. CRAP!! nw my tagboard still got de this pg cnnt be displayed thingy!! ohh fuck. my dae can't get anymore worse=x fuck fuck fuck. everyth's gg wrong! my life's crashin. on me. haiz wtf. its jus so simple. . . worry worry worry abt tmr!! but yet i'm still here slackin slackin slackin!!! [random: i love shootin balls(:] . okaye. i shall stop. for 2dae(x n YOU. pls note tt i'm not a exactly a person who would wait for long~ n my bestie! CHEER UPso tell me the ans soon n if necessary, i shall get over it myself, n it would be NO THX TO U:D Sunday, April 22, 20079:04 PM REPLY TAGS(: . [ada] love u too yo!!((: cya tmr. lols. dere's choir again. n u tagged this like urm, 5 daes ago n i'm replin onli nw hahas:D lovesloves<3 . [jianle]SYF's over alr nw den i repli. hahas(: yep u tc too yo:D loveya<33 . [jinni]hahas n u hor. dun carry out ur PLAN B. tt's even more dumb alrites?? loveya((: . [blacky/contradictor]u're de same person rite, RIZVAN?? hahas((: . [melanie]thx yo((: cya tmr. i'm so lag in replin(x loveya<33 . [shawn]thx yo<33 . [anqi] thx yo my dearie(x yep u're my BRIGHTER SIDE OF LIFE ALRITES!!!((: loveya n cya tmr<33> . [jinmin]thx((: loves<33 . [anqi]of cos it was worth it((: loves<33 . [melanie]we rock rite?? hahas(((x . [brenda]thx brenda. u rock yo((: loves n cya tmr<333 . [jem]sorrie luh u. dun call me stupid. i still love u though<3333(: . [charis] loveya always!!!((:<333 . [huiting]hey.. yo!(: . [peiyun]bleh=x u arh.. hahas. rocker arh? loveya loads<333 . [huiting] this one i replied on my tagboard alr. yupp.((: . [xinyi] hey thx u rocker((: i'll cheer up=x loveya loads!!!<333 . [deborah]hey rocker.loveya so much<333> . [ada] ohhyeah man. we rock too much luh=x hahas. loveya loads<333 . [alb-c pres]hey u rocker. tag more okaye?? cya((x . [chuin chi] i love u so much too!! cya tmr<333 . [melanie] thx loads yo!!<333 . [charis] wah sai leh u. liddat u also can c i spell wrongly?? hahas((: i didn't realise until i go n c properly leh!!((: paiseh hor=x . [pamela]hey rocker!!((: loveya loads. every1 rocked!<333 . [chermaine]<333 . [vanessa] I LOVE YOU x 100 time((: hahas.<33 . [anqi] yo! cya tmr. i'll tell u loads!((: be honoured!! loves<333 .sighs. i duno luh. its crashin. once again. n i'm not fast enough to catch all the pieces. . done. hahas. 2dae was so damn borin. shall not go on to elaborate abt it alr luh. bleh=x dere's choir tmr again leh. some de-brief thingy lo. haiz. wadever(: i dun mind(x Friday, April 20, 20079:11 PM I'M FINALLI DONE BLOGGIN 4 2DAE. FORCED TO STOP USING DE COM. SIGHS. I'VE MUCH MORE TO SAE THOUGH. NVM. I'LL JUS KIP IT 2 MY OWN LIL WORLD N NOBODY CARES. . . u dun anymore rites? or do you? nw i duno wad to think. my world cried again. n wham. it jus crashed on me. it hurts. alot. can it stop repeatin? 8:44 PM long post rites [ de one below.] it could hav been longer luh, but i left out details here n dere. lols((: happie happie happie lil me (x we rock alrite. i know alot of ppl hav alr mentioned this [or did they?] but we are THE 1ST BATCH OF CHOIR PPL TO GET GOLD WITH HONOURS FOR AHS ALRITES??!! whoots. happaye ppl we are! hahas yupp. . . for those who are feelin sad cos of different reasons, pls cheer up okays??? i did n so muz u. [especially u my bestie. dun feel so down le(((: smiles] i hav no idea why but my world stopped smilin when u did not jus now. n ytd too. i was worried. . my world stopped smiling days ago. it recovered. u made it cry again. wanna sae again tt i love all of those who said dey will be by my side(: loves<33 6:45 PM ytd was like so damn fun can?? hahas.. choir number 44, anglican high school, GOLD WITH HONOURS!!!!(((: yupp. i think everyone was super high can??? . went to music room in de morn, den talk talk talk with charis yupp.. den we sing under mr kwei's guidance. is lyk with wad he taught us we sang well luh [compared to the rest ytd bah..] n he said tt we sounded good! . mr toh arrived late, cos he went for a jab!!! he was sick luh, but he still wanted to conduct us, so he took a jab.. JUS 4 US!! hope he gets well soon. . anw our lunch was like RECESS TIME n i had toast(: every1 was like sayin, wad time's ur syf huh? n good luck hor! n de sort luh.. . cheryl helped me with my bun again, n i was busy tyin my scarf. i felt tt it was nice enough alr n decided not 2 touch it anymore if not ltr it'll be ruined or sth luh. bleh=P . n den, we went onto de bus bringin us to VCH. quite alot of other ppl went also..[ seniors, our batch de ppl..] tenors n sops to a bus, altos n basses 2 a bus(: we put our make up on de way.. i managed 2 apply foundation n blush, but it wasn't enough luh. still too light. hahas. tio-ed ms sng's brown lipstick cos she said tt i had NTH on my lips though i actualli had applied chairs's de nice nice lipstick luh. it jus wasn't tt obvious enough. . nervous nervous time aft tt 4 almost all. when we were waitin 4 our turn aft de pierce sec? i tink is pierce bah. i was feelin too hungry to care too much luh. tummy was over there complainin luh(: n since we couldn't hug, [cos its like sorta a tradition tt if we hug den we wud get silver or sth..] i was lyk jus givin everyone an air handshake to ask em to jiayou, hahas(: . aft de performance, we hanged ard to watch summore performances. lyk de fairfield they all luh yupp.. [they were good, so everyone started to feel abit scared] den charis vanessa jemimah cheryl chuin chi n me went to pizza hut for lunch+dinner. . then it was de waitinforresults time. we almost couldn't get in 2 know the results live luh. den suddenli de person cum out n tell us tt every sch can hav 1o more ppl inside! we chiong in luh [ chuin chi jem charis cheryl bella vanessa chermaine pam deb n me!] we took up 2 rows luh, den de other side got alot more ahs choir ppl also!!((: . den it was the damn anxious time. results. dey announced by appearance. 1st 5 schs or so got bronze. so jem who was sittin beside me started CRYIN ALR!! i was lyk.. OMG DUN CRY. we're not gna get bronze or silver luh!! she still cried n cried.. den de announcement came. ANGLICAN HIGH SCHOOL : GOLD WITH HONOURS!! we all started screamin n shoutin lyk some crazi fanatics luh!! jus screamed n screamed n started cryin with tears of happiness.. i finally noe wad is tears of happiness((: we were all damn emo!! we didn't care abt all the other choirs results alr. [aft tt i heard onli 2 schs got gold, xinmin n fairfield. n we were de onli one who got gwh!!!] . gg outside, we screamed summore. we jus went super duper high!!!!!!! wah until nw i'm still feelin quite high!((((: hahas. we cam whored loads luh!![currently i'm loadin de pics, so they'll b seen at de end of de post!] yupp. so sad can. THE SEC FOUR SENIORS ARE LEAVIN. I'M SO SAD!!! THEY ARE SUCH NICE PPL ALRITES!! I LOVE THEM LOADS!!<333 . den kept buggin de sec 3s, CAN WE GO FOR ICE CREAM NOW??? elissa n i waited. n waited. n waited. den we got so bu[4] nai[4] fan[3] until we kip sayin n sayin luh!!((: . dhen we went to gelare! i shall repeat again. I LOVE LEONGYING I LOVE CHARIS I LOVE VANESSA I LOVE ELISSA I LOVE JENIMAH I LOVE CHUIN CHI I LOVE MEI XUAN I LOVE LIM YING I LOVE CHERYL<333bleh=P . N NW FOR DE LONG AWAITED PICS:  ME N BELLA<3  CHUIN CHI N ME<3  ME N LEONGYING<3  MEIXUAN N ME<3  ELISSA N ME<3  MR TOH N ME<3  PAM N ME<3  ME N JIAYE<3  YINGJUN N ME<3  JIAYE N ME AGAIN<3  VANESSA N ME<3  CHERMAINE N ME<3  CORN N ME<3  VANESSA N ME AGAIN we're wearin our costume top n at pizza hut. with makeup on too  JEM CHUIN CHI N ME on the bridge<3  VANESSA N ME AGAIN AGAIN((:<3  CHOIR ROOM. PIC TAKEN OF MIRROR  CHARIS ME N PAM in music room<3  CHARIS ME N JEM in music room<3  ALTOS DE HOTTIES+MR TOH!((: we rock yo! loves. . . . I LOVE CHOIR(:♥ 2:29 PM i'm currently at anqi's hse. shall blog a short post yo. yupp. hmm. GOLD WITH HONS.GOLD WITH HONS.GOLD WITH HONS.GOLD WITH HONS.GOLD WITH HONS.GOLD WITH HONS.GOLD WITH HONS.GOLD WITH HONS.GOLD WITH HONS.GOLD WITH HONS.GOLD WITH HONS.GOLD WITH HONS.GOLD WITH HONS.GOLD WITH HONS.GOLD WITH HONS.GOLD WITH HONS.GOLD WITH HONS.GOLD WITH HONS. . okaye i shall stop nw. wahahas((: i shall update abt ytd with pics:D cya. . I LOVE LEONGYING. I LOVE ELISSA. I LOVE CHARIS. I LOVE JENNA. I LOVE VANESSA. I LOVE CHUIN CHI. I LOVE CHERYL. I LOVE MEIXUAN. I LOVE JEMIMAH. [hahas paiseh arh jem. loveya loads<333] Tuesday, April 17, 20078:12 PM wadeva. life sucks. ehh bestie i jus read ur blog also. haiz. u CHEER UP yo. sighs. . an edited quote: dun think that ur life sucks. try mine alrites i still love you. it i'll reply tags: [brenda] thx yo. loveya((: . [chowy] i'm damn diaoded can! u tt kinda thing also can copy!! lols. tt's y i love u luh hor. spastic(((: . [chowy] u horny means u horny can(: hahas. just admit it luh u(: loves<33 . [shipei] chowy is so damn horny yo! okays thx loads anw.. loves(:<33 . [leongying] paiseh arh i haven relink.. hahas(: lazy to lei.. i'll relink when i hav de tym.. n i didn't see u wif a bun!((: . [anqi] u'll always be my dearie yo! teddy teddy.. . [yj] yo rocker! loves so much n thx man. complimentin tt my blog spoils ur eyesight((:<33 . [tingwei] asshole luh u((: jk jk.. yupp. dun copy paste luh!!!=x . [yj] tingwei's damn noisy. i agree so much yo!((: . [huiting] u're my dearie mah. I LOVE YOU yo! lucki u're quite well 2dae alr((: n thx 4 helpin me.. loveya<3333 . yupp n that's abt it.. . wah sai luh d'you know she's like always tiaopolijian-ing. wadeva luh. asshole can. i hate her. fucker. sorrie 4 being so vulgar. but wadeva. 7:37 PM i duno. wadeva. i also duno wad to sae anymore. so huiting's talkin 2 u for me bah (i think) yupp. i duno how u'll think. the situation got much more worse than i thot it would get. but one thing's for sure. i still love you. i duno wad u'll think. killing myself softly. its totally coming true alrites. sighs. i wonder.. i feel so.. so.. heartbroken now alrites. i'm really sorrie. i didn't know that it was going to turn out this way. i thot that it would be better. nvm. i'll just hang in thr. n hopefully the whole matter will blow over soon. regardless of the result. [obviously i hope tht it will be positive(:] but i want u to know. i realli don't want to. but i know that things will never ever be the same again. n 'cos of that. i feel so damn depressed alrites): thx u darlin peepos. for being thr 4 me. my bestie(: so sorrie that i misunderstood u. bleh. [i feel lyk shit] u cheer up also alrites?? loves. n my kor too. mm. thx loads<3 u didn't need to suggest to come n pei[3] me luh hahas(: but thx anw. u rock:D sighs. confused. lols. yupp. n sorraye jinni n glen. i think i spoiled the whole atmosphere of 2dae. bleh. realli realli sorrie))): n JINNI, pls dun use PLAN B. u'll realli regret it ltr. glen n i will jus kill u if u carry out plan B okay. but if u realli realli think its damn suitable or wad. den suit urself(: hmm. anw i think its all just a realli serious misunderstanding. [lyk wtf. y didn't i realise it sooner?] i've got lyk some prob in my head luh wtf. i jus didn't realise okay. fuck. i duno y. fucked up. Saturday, April 14, 20079:30 PM SORRAYE FOR ALL THE EMO-STUFF 2DAE ): CAN'T HELP IT LUH OKAY. 9:08 PM i knew it. _'__ ______ ______ _____ ____ __. wadeva. _ ____'_ ____ __ _____. lols. ____. i feel ____. alot of it. sorraye. this time. i'm keepin it to myself.[y did i let my curiousity get the better of me? if i didn't do that, i wouldn't be feelin this way.] i'm sorraye. but i found out. ____ _ ____. to me. -crushed i'm realli ___ nw. _____________. everythin. u created __ _______ _____ ___ ___ ___ ___ ______ __ _____ __. i feel realli _______. ____ n ______. * ______ nw also alrites. u said __ __, _ _____ ___ ___. i now know otherwise. i'm jus too freakin _____________ now to care. nvm. i have _____ ___ ard me. ppl who will never, ever ___ __ me. ______ ___. _ ____ ___. * ____. _ ___'_ _____ _____ ___ _______. ___ ___. u TOTALLY took __ _____ ____. _'__ _____ _______ ___ ___ ____.[u wun know wad i'm saying. but i hope u'll use ur brains n think alrites(:] 7:50 PM okayes. i guess u dun realli care at all, do u? 2dae was a happi dae, i guess. sowie. but i was jus thinkin abt stuff. yupp. so i'm realli realli sorraye. hmm. it realli seems so. even though u sae its not tt way. wadeva. we can't turn back time. bac to whr we started. so. i guess i jus hafta hope 4 de best(: put a smile on my face n jus move forward. although its not a genuine smile. i'll jus have to make do with it. i jus have too mani thoughts in my head nowadaes. it seems. i just keep thinkin that u jus dun bother. do you? haiz i doubt that u will care much luh. will u? lols i'm emo-ing again. wth. i dun fulfil resolutions. sighs. but i just need to get all these out. or i'll just.. i duno. lols(: smiles. cheers. i resolve to talk less. from now. i must make it. although ppl will. find it damn weird. [i noe i wun make it] [but i must try] hopefully i'll succeed. keepin to myself. that's wad i'll do. hopefully(x me talkin too much has been causing too mani. problems. for myself. yepp. u mean too much to me. i dun wan any more problems. to surface. or anyth. or all the small lil problems. i dun want them too. it jus adds up. n makes me think too much. thx my bestie. for wanting me to be happie. i want u to be happie too(: u're also quite down these few daes.. lyk quite sad or wad.. loveya. wanna go out again soon yo[: n to U. hmm. loveya too. but. haiz nvm yep. u may think that i'm just crappin alot yo. but ask urself. for the past few daes. did u talk to me. without mi msgin u first or wad? we dun even talk on the phone. like we used to anymore. nvm. i dun mind anymore. dun wanna think about it too. cheerup! to myself n everyone else. out there who are emo-ing lyk mi:D n please. be there for me. alrites?(: i realli hope u would. okaye. enough of all that emo-ing bullshit. i shall stop alr. anw, lookin 4ward to tuesdae yo!(: but de sad thing is tt i'm broke luh. so sad rites. haiz. damn sian lei. every wk also broke. lols. sorrie lo, if this post too emo, wadeva. crap. no-one's askin u to read anws(x i've edited this post lyk duno hw mani tyms le luh. addin all de itsy bitsy stuff.. hahas. so lame rites(: but i still rock de hor:D 7:07 PM got in. lols(: haiz. 2dae choir so wad luh. full dress. hot lyk sai can. zzz. feel so sad eugenia din get in lei. boohoo)): yj got in yo! cheers(x den rites, durin de run-thru, on stage it was so damn hot luh can. cos got de spotlights n all tt.. lols. den i tink all our scarves r lyk drippin wif sweat or sth. haiz. disgustin. den aft tt went out. wif nick. awhile. buy loo jinni's pressie [u'll get it on mon alrites(:] watched meet de robinsons. hahas. jiaye n pearlyna also watch. lols but i din c em luh. go in theatre tt tym veh dark alr. din manage 2 c em. but jiaye sae she saw me. hahas. de movie not bad luh. de boi's de father of tt 13 yr old guy. lols(: spent loads of $$ 1dae. pok alr. haiz. guess i'll hafta scrimp n save nxt wk. sighs): love mi dear HUITING n ANQI n also U luh duh <3 n a happaye b'dae to LOO JINNI alrites??? (((: -loveya mi dear gurl!!!<3 Friday, April 13, 20079:34 PM ohh yeah man! nw i get to do mornin duty wif mi dear dear CHOWY!!! she is so damn HORNY yo! we get to slack slack slack nw luh! she pangseh joseph cos she changed duty wif tenghui n nw she's doin sidegate duty wif ME(: [btw, we were playin games luh jus nw=)] haiz den aft tt PE as usual luh. so borin. run 10 mins. but i ran wif huiting all de way(: den plae table tennis. we rock as a team luh, anyhw hit also can score. WE ROCK=D lalas. den finally noe hw much i get 4 ytd's math test. A2. not bad luh. considerin de fact tt i've been scorin onli passes 4 this yr. lols. recess rites, tt jinni was lyk demandin pressie fr mi luh. den when other ppl gif her pressie tt tym, den she'll b lyk "ohh, thx arh, realli thx leh" to mi she's lyk " whr's mi present???" lols. so pian[1] xin[1] rites. hahas. wait awhile more gurl. patience is a virtue. u'll get ur pressie on mondae((: haiz. so that's de reason? okay anyth. yupp. loveya(: hey i'm lyk realli sowie yo. hafta pangseh u 2dae.. bleh i feel so bad. n u seemed so sad 2dae lei. haiz realli sowie hor): hope u'll feel bettr by tmr alrites?? cheer up. u muz feel bettr okay.. i shall lyk aft so long finally post sum pics nw luh okay?(:  this is anqi huggin de bearbear tt she fell in love wif. hahas((: aww so sweet rites?? (:  this is peiyun eatin cuttlefish de thingy in class((: hahas de whole class was eatin it but i couldn't do anyth. GRACE PERIOD yo. (:  this is sum veh sweet choco egg alrites!!!((: sweet until cnnt sweet lei. i accidentally dropped it into de cup when nick was holdin de cup n i was attemptin 2 scoop de gooey gooey stuff out=P bleh. (:  another pic of de egg(: (:  anqi tryin 2 touch her nose wif her tongue in class!! i took this when chi cher was teachin lols. so sian luh tt tym. every1 was fallin aslp i tink. haiz. dere's choir tmr. 4 de last tym wif de seniors): tt's so sad 2 hear rites.. Thursday, April 12, 20078:52 PMLIFE SERIOUSLY SUCKS. lols anw im supposed to be doing sum freakin geog hw but im not touchin it cos of f****ing pat wong alrites. she scold an qi n mi 2dae sae wad we everytym oso talkin. lyk wtf luh! sucker. ur lesson so boring we dun talk will die de can?? den summore ppl eat RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU u also nv see. WTH? lols nvm. i shall not be agitated by ppl like u anymore. asshole. i'll continue to talk all i want(: [lols i'm so lame luh] promise: go to every shoppin mall in s'pore(: [hope tt it can be accomplished yo:D] i shall continue to crap abt anyth i can think of. ohhya. jus nw when at tm wif anqi, saw chermaine lyk 3 tyms luh. hahas(: so qiao. saw corn 2 tyms. den also saw shuyi n chuin chi at ntuc. lols. bought avril's pressie alr:D [wanted to buy her de bikini but no money alr luh, so 4get it(:] anqi also buy pressie 4 yj le.. i guess i need to be quieter [not becos of pat wong]but realli i jus need to tone down alr too much noise. that isn't good. especially for me. everything's going wrong. i jus wanna be left alone now. i resolve to be quiet. please let me fulfil it okaye. i wish it will solve everything. everything will solve by itself. but that isn't going to happen. so wad else muz i do? leave me alone. fading away.. falling apart.. helpless.CRAPSHIT. love mi darlin dearies<3 HUITING- U CNNT TELL HOR. SEE I TRUST U SO I TELL U SO NW U DUN EVER BREAK MI TRUST N TELL OR ELSE I FAN[1] LIAN[3] HOR!(: all the time. i see bastards n bitches n backstabbers. sometimes i'm one of em[not bastard luh]. but i despise them. tt's y i despise myself at times too. but i've never heard of stories so sad. crap. i can go on n on. wadever. feelin damn emo-ish nw can. but u cant stop mi. cos this is mi blog n i type wad i lyk. LIFE SUCKS. eg: tmr's gna be a bad dae again. 2dae was a fuckin boring dae. we live de same way every single dae. wadever luh. but mi bestie still rocks luh. i'm not angry n i still wna go out. lols. so random rites(: too bad. cos our saturdaes are ending soon.. okaye. i'm finalli done crappin. tmr i hav duty. so i'll see jinni n chowy<3 p.s: can sum1 hu reads this entri tell mi if mi font got prob?? as in if it overlaps?? thx(x 7:48 PM boring boring dae. shall not elaborate further. dere's choir tmr. wadeva. i dun know if u realli care about how i feel. but i still love u. i hope u know that. my life's dull enough alr. dun make it worse for me. i'm holding on. be there for me (: onceuponthisbrokenheartofmine. duno wad else to sae alr luh. so boring de. lols. hope tmr will be better. but.. maybe.. oh wadever. i shall see then. there's nth much more tt i can hope 4.. except for de best bah. Wednesday, April 11, 20079:36 PM HEY(: jus nw got math remedial luh. den hor, nick cum mi class wait 4 mi mah [thx hor(:]. but den duno y rites, de jinni gracia corinne n xk oso appear at mi class lols. den 2a de ppl all lyk so diaoded, y r dere ppl fr other classes here.. dey confirm thinkin is i ask em 2 cum de luh, wadeva.. lols. yupp anw aft remedial slacked in class away wif jinni nick n xk luh yupp. jinni was meetin caleena, but in de end caleena came up 2 2a to meet her lols. den jinni still dun understand tt formula luh, so caleena tried to explain. jinni still lyk blur blur smile abit abit lo. sae she understand but still liddat. hahas. mm. den went to library [tamp]. sit dere study abit abit den slack liao.. go walk ard as usual. fun de can((: bettr dan gg home or sth =x haiz. i think u jus dun care much. maybe it'll be better now. i hope. sometimes i feel that u jus dun care luh. but i dun tell u this. even if i do, u jus sae u hav ur reasons luh yupp. so wad else can i do?? nothin. nvm. i'll jus suffer in silence. cry myself to sleep at night. softly. softly... hmm... love mi bestie yeah!!! <333> promise: same combi. same class((: dun fall sick alrites!:D take care of urself.. this post quite rushed arh.. hahas, so quite short luh, will most more nxt tym(: Saturday, April 07, 200710:19 PM haiz. 3rd post for de dae.lols. damn sian luhs. yupp. de show was not bad bah. but i din realli get 2 c de endin ocs of sum reasons luh yupp. lols so nvm(: haiz. headache nw. so sick of headaches. bleh=P 6:26 PM random post. i love lollies. i love going out wif mi bestie((: i love [sum1]. i love everythin. hahas i noe i veh diaos rite! nvm. but im still veh veh addicted 2 sweets. mi bestie saes if liddat always go out wif mi will get diabetes sooner or ltr de. hahas! den we get it 2gether n go hospital 2gether lyk i mentioned b4 hor! lols. so random rites. bleh=P. ohh yeah jinni, ask glen n qinhui go out again hor!! yupp(: see when got tym luh alrites!! hahas. cousins stayin over 2dae. but their lyk onli wad, 7 & 10?? wth?? lols. haiz. but its not as boring as i expected bah yupp((: so nw i'm postin cos i got nth 2 do lols. mi 10 yr old cuz wants to use de com. he is attempting to lure mi away from it by taking away mi fone. lols. hahas nvm. i shall ignore tt n continue typin(: yeah okayes. mayb i'll start caring abt mi fone nw. so ltr(: [mayb i'll hav another post again when im bored. or mayb not. cos i'll b watchin a walk 2 remember. de book was so damn touchin <3 |
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